NerdTests.com Quiz: Would you survive on planet of the apes?

Everything takes insticts, especially when you need to save someone's life. I'm not talking about repeling down a cliff to save a stupid person who hadn't been looking where they were going, I'm talking about when someone is dying from some monkey-transmitted disease when your on a stranded island and your the only one not howling and throwing poop. Your strange, primate companion needs your help!

After sailing your life-boat into an island with one of your best friends/family members, what do you two do first?

Build some shelter, it looks like it's going to rain.
Find some coconuts and crack those puppies open! Eating raw food isn't all that bad!
Sunbathe. This is just like vacation!
Train a toucan to circle the island and check for incoming boats and planes every 10 minutes.
Start a signal fire. You don't plan to be here long.

There's a bunch of monkeys here! You and your friend agree:

I don't trust anything furry...when they're not looking take a tree branch and whack the little hairy goblins over the head!
They were here first, just leave them alone.
They're fine as long as they don't interfer with our survival. If they do, they're going down!
Let the fear get the best of you and pass out. Plane's will be able to see you both better if you're sprawled out on the beach.
Stay on the beach, they like the trees anyway.

Those monkeys crossed the line! One came up close and you both cooed and your friend tryed to pet it but turns out, it's not so sweet! It bites your friend! You:

Scream, scream, and scream some more.
Scream and take the little brat and toss him into the fire.
Scream and start whacking the stupid primate until he stops.
Take the sling-shot that you built, aim and FIRE!
Jump behind a rock and grimace. Then say "That looks painful!" in a sympathetic manner.

You manage to fight off the ferril monkey and you bandage your friend's arm. The next morning he/she starts complaining that they feel like they fell off a cliff. You:

Start a signal fire, your friend's got rabies, you need to get out of there pronto!
Whack him/her in the head with a coconut when they don't expect it. If they're unconcious they can't feel any pain!
Crumble under te preasure. Piss off another, bigger, stronger monkey that can kill you. It's not suicide!
Try to operate with a sharp rock you found. Surgeons just act like they know what they're doing anyway!
Make a really tight rope out of seaweed and cut off their circulation on their arm so the infected blood can't spread.

It's day 3 now, and your friend's starting to act weird...like they're howling like a chimp and scratching their armpits.

Poke him/her with a stick. See what makes them tick!
Start crying and say "Come back! I need you!"
Try to talk them down. They're still the same person!
Carefully tie your friend down. What if they turn into a monkey and bite YOU!?!
Back away slowly and leave. The other side of the island is safer!

Your friend has started throwing their own poop at you. Are you good at playing dodgeball?

That's a kid's game!
I think I could be good if my life depended on it...
I'm a master!
I'm a spaz and proud of it!
Is it bad if you get hit a lot?

Your friend has started climbing trees and throwing coconuts at you, you:

Dodge.
Hide behind a rock.
Try to catch as many as possible, it's almost like you're working as a team to get food!
Climb up and push your friend off the tree.
Run into the water and swim out as far as you can until your friend stops chucking.

You've been here for a week and your friend is still acting weird! You:

Do what has to be done and kill your friend.
Take the easy way out. Suicide.
Build a boat and abandon your friend.
Eat anything your friend dishes out, you can take it!
I can't stand it! You take rocks and start spelling out "HELP ME!" on the beach.

Day 30 You have to get out of here! You NEED to start a signal fire! What do you use for wood?

Your friend had started growing fur, so you shave his/her arm and burn that. It will smell like fried lemur but it will get the job done.
Get your slingshot incase of rabid monkeys, and go to the jungle to get some tinder.
Yank out every hair on your head and light it. There's no such thing as style on this island!
Try burning the wood from your wraft, you wouldn't be able to sail back anyway!
Sand burns right? Let's go for it!

10)

You manage to get a fire started, and your friend has started going fetal, so they still can't help. The sky looks like your mom did when you broke her favorite vase...god you miss your mom!

There looks like there's a hurricane coming...WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!
HOLY CRAP! OH WHY GOD? WHY DO YOU HATE ME SO?
Eat until your ungodly full, then tie yourself and your friend to trees.
Run around in circles screaming "AUNTY EM! AUNTY EM! IT'S A TWISTER! IT'S A TWISTER!"
Hide in themiddele of the jungle so that the rain and rain can't get to you and your friend.

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