the study of the "Gangster" by IDK

[idk]

NOTE: this is not real! it is a satirical piece, created for the readers enjoyment.

scientists previously thought pre-evolution to be impossible, they however revoked those theries at the discovery of a new species, Stupidius Huminae. or more commonly known as the "gangster"

now with some study of this strange Human-like Sub Species, you can learn quite a bit. movement wise they are rather interesting, almost amusing to watch, they walk on two their hind legs, wide spread, their shoulders held out, to look as experts guess, threatening to possible predators.

they often hunt, and travel in small packs, sticking with well known pack members, they often prey on smaller people, or sometimes women, for amusement, and entertainment, they are a violent species so you do not want to cross one, they have been known to attack viciously, using their sharp long claws, (often referred to as "knives") and some of the more evolved ones have figured out how to use archery to hunt prey, (Although people say it's guns they hunt with)

this species has an interesting reaction to music, they often listen to music, written by other members of their species, usually this music includes odd grunting sounds, possibly related to mating, odd noises commonly related to dumpsters being hit in garbage hunts. they often portray females of their species in these videos, the females, in these video's portray their "mating courtship, or dance" for the male "Gangster" to receive some enjoyment, this mating ritual can often be closely resembled to Human female strip teases, and Night Club dances.
for your own safety, do not interupt the music of a Stupidius Huminae because they WILL attack you, if you witness a "Gangster" attack on a human, call the police, do not waste your time with animal control, or shoot them yourself, you will be doing the world a favor

the Stupidius Huminae has been known to attack humans, they are a larger animal, the same size of a human, so their attacks get reported to the police, not animal control. due to the level of danger involved in the attack.

the Female species of the Stupidius Huminae are harder to recognize, as they are far more intelligent then their male counterparts, they also walk on their hind legs, but they have a distinct strut, often used to grab the attention of the males.


the males of the Stupidius Huminae are sometimes confused for normal male humans, and placed in human educational institution's, they can be blamed for the magority of the human populations illiteracy rates.




so guys, tell me what you think! :p

[idk]

wow, I'm oddly surprised nobody replied to this yet.

[EdTheN00bProgrammer]

But they're really just mentally retarded Neanderthals put in clothes like circus animals to entertain us.

[idk]

But they're really just mentally retarded Neanderthals put in clothes like circus animals to entertain us.

that, I sadly must agree with.

it's funny, today I absolutely slaughtered one, almost twice my size (I'm a scrawny fellow @ 127-130 pounds)

they claim to be such good fighters...

[welshnerd]

But they're really just mentally retarded Neanderthals put in clothes like circus animals to entertain us.

that, I sadly must agree with.

it's funny, today I absolutely slaughtered one, almost twice my size (I'm a scrawny fellow @ 127-130 pounds)

they claim to be such good fighters...

Ha I finally understand the post now, I never really read it properly, I have now and I can see that it is quite amusing!

[idk]

^^

glad you enjoyed it welshenerd