Do you ever eat rhinestones/sparkles?

  No... why would I??
  YES THEY ARE DELICIOUS AND SPARKLY WHAT MORE COULD I WANT????
  Sometimes
  Only for breakfast... should I eat them more??

Do you ever find yourself staring at rainbows for hours on end?

  They're cool, but I'm not that weird...
  Rainbows are stupid.
  OMG I LOVE THEM THEY ARE SO COOL LIKE THEY ARE A GIFT FROM THE GODS RAINBOWS ARE MY LIFE
  What are rainbows?? (me: *wtf?*)

Have you ever pooped rainbows?

  YES I'M SO GLAD I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE I DO IT EVERY DAY
  No.
  Maybe...
  Sometimes I do... Only when I eat rhinestones though...

Can you fly?

  I LOVE FLYING THE WIND RUNNING THROUGH MY MANE MAKES ME FEEL SO HAPPY AND THEN I FART GLITTER OMG
  No.
  I really want to but I can't :(
  I can fly when I have had my morning rhinestones...

Do you have a horn on your head?

  No. My head is perfectly normal.
  I have a small lump... (it may be a head implant... *sweats nervously*)
  YES I HAVE ONE ITS ALL SWIRLY AND PRETTY AND IT HAS MAGICAL POWERS
  I have a *cough FAKE cough* one and I wear it everywhere

Are you related (family) to a self confessed unicorn?

  No.
  I have my suspicions that I am related to one...
  MY UNBORN GRANDCHILD'S SON WILL BE A UNICORN
  YES MY WHOLE FAMILY ARE UNICORNS BUT I AM BY FAR THE MOST RAINBOW FILLED AND FABULOUS

What do you think about the unicorn meat that is/was on sale in America?

  What? That's awful :(
  THEY KILLED MY BROTHER AND THE WHOLE UNICORN CLAN HAD TO RUN AWAY AND MOVE :,(
  pft... unicorns aren't real.
  Unicorn meat? YUMMY!!!

Do you have a mane and tail?

  That's for horses...
  I consider my hair as my mane?
  WELL OF COURSE!!!! MINE HAS SPARKLEY BITS
  I sometimes pretend I do, but I don't have one... D:

How did you find this test?

  UNICORNY AND FABULOUS!!!!!!
  Pointless.
  fun!
  Weird...