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Redneck - Letter To Moma
I am rightin' this here letter slow as I know ya cain't read fast. Me and my wife and the kids and 6 dogs went and moved last week. I took the house numbers with us so we don't have to do one of them there address changes. I got me a good job here. I finally got to be a pilot. I work for Daniel's Tree Service. They cut the wood and I pilot. Things here are about the same.
We took Grandma to the doctor so she could get Grandpa some of them Viagra pills. She slipped them into his coffee so he wouldn't know. He went crazy. He grabbed her and ripped her clothes off right there in front of all us. He throwed everything off the table and kept taking her over and over again. Grandma said the sex was great but she is upset that the people at McDonalds said we couldn't come back no more.
I went whorse back riddin' the other day. I'm lucky to be alive. That whorse took off and I almost fell off. I was hangin' on for my life and screamin' my head off. I don't know what I'd done if that manager from K-Mart hadn't come out and unplugged it.
Right back soon and remember we love ya. XXXXXXXXX
Yer Sun - Brandon